There is a saying which has been out there for a long time, that states: “As one door closes, another one opens”. The idea is used to tell you that when things dont go your way, it is okay because maybe something good is about to happen. One wonders if there might be any hidden danger in acccepting these comforting rationilizations just about anytime when things go wrong in our lives. The problem with such ideas is that depending on the actual events of your life, and how much comfort one dervives from such rationilizations, it could lead an individual to complacently accept various misfortunes.

There is no doubt that various doors in my life, have sometimes seem to shut in front of my face in slow motion. It is hard to even recognize things like this because they do happen in such slow motion. For example, someone might be living their life, and are in their late 20′s or early 30′s. During these years they have plenty of business ideas, altruistic goals, and plans on getting married, having children, and living happily ever after. Then after time (which could be measured in months, then later in years) one starts to notice, “hey these things that I want do, do not seem to be happening”. If one did not afford the themselves the comforting rationilizations which just about everyone is happy to offer every time something does not go your way, then maybe they could simply stand up and tell themeselves; “It looks, I have failed in my attempt at xyz.”

In reality, I would say that this rarely ever happens. If it did happen, and it was because a person put forth an honest effort, did their due diligence and failed to obtain his goal, then that could be viewed as an honest attempt which simply failed to produce the desired result. Some of the major obstacles that an individual may face in achieving self-actualization may indeed be cultural. This is where I would like to suggest that a paradigm shift might be taking place right now even as we speak.

One of the easiest paradigms to take on is that the little sayings that come out of the mouths of our friends and family are typically meant to encourage us. I would like to suggest that this may not be true. For example when you miss out on a great opportunity, people will typically say, I guess it was not meant to be. Perhaps a better approach would be for the other person to try to find out what the opportunity was. It is quite possible that the opportunity is still out there, and that door is not yet closed.

A Chassidish Comedian- No Joke!

We are our own worst enemies. Becoming successful at something means letting go of connecting with being a failure. The biggest problem associated with becoming successful is change. Additionally the vocabulary which is so often repeated when one is seeking to obtain their goals or achieve self actualization is really badly in need of a major overhaul.

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